Many thanks for composing in order to you. We realize just how tough it is making sense regarding arguments which might be grounded so much more inside social and individual preferences and you can smaller in spiritual and you can ethical values. Review a few of the situations i establish below so you can come for some decision how we need to deal with this issue together with your parents.
Basic, during particular schools out-of believe a beneficial Muslim woman have to have new permission from her wali (guardian) to track down married, there was good arrangement you to definitely an effective Muslim guy can marry rather than the permission of his parents. We want to state first, however, that we are located in not a way indicating you to definitely Muslims forget the main role one to parents normally and really should enjoy regarding the wedding process. However, as in your own circumstances, mom and dad are insisting for the a certain attitude one is really maybe not supported from inside the Islam, i.age. declining an applicant to own matrimony oriented strictly into the racial and you will social factors.
Next, centered on what you wrote, we think that your mothers might not simply be emphasizing competition and you can people, nevertheless they have more legitimate concerns as well. Why don’t we focus on the admission your “maybe not the best Muslim.” We are really not yes the way you are employing the phrase “finest,” and is possible that your parents as well as differ about “perfect” a great Muslim you are. As you are trying to marry a female who’s today Christian it is looking to return so you’re able to Islam, your mother and father will in addition be concerned that the faith will suffer since you are perhaps not “perfect” on your behavior today and you may she’ll getting only starting in mastering in regards to the faith.
A special possibility is that your mother and father are inextricably connecting Islam having Turkish culture, i.age. are Turkish is equivalent to becoming Muslim. Once more, they are certainly not alone this way as the the majority of people of different countries have comparable notions. The theory will be to help your mother and father know individuals of all racial and you will social history is and do end up being Muslims. Eg reverts are required to only give-up people regions of the countries that will be expressly taboo for the Islam, we.e. having a drink, drinking pork, and you can ancestral praise in order to title a number of. Other regions of their people from origin can also be and must getting employed if they can be found in range with Islamic lessons. Your mother and father might become endangered your coming youngsters will not end up being instructed Turkish community because their mommy is not Turkish.
3rd, i desire you to not characterize this problem you are against while the an either otherwise, we.elizabeth. either you to visit a beneficial sin because of the disobeying your parents and you will marrying which woman or you going a sin by “blindly” obeying your mother and father rather than marrying that it lady. The reality in the problem is that you is held responsible for your entire procedures and how you would those actions. The challenge off obeying your mother and father is a valid one, you is actually an older mature and will also be held responsible to suit your procedures. Islam gives you the ability to get married good righteous Muslim woman minus the consent of the parents, while it is highly needed getting their parents’ true blessing as the you move forward toward wedding. Dont think breaking off the relations with your parents simply so that you can marry this lady. You actually have a duty to maintain friends hence, you need to do all things in your capability to get to particular mutual understanding together with your parents regarding it matter.
Finally, you should do that which you is to save obvious lines out-of communications with your moms and dads so they can just remember that , you don’t propose to ditch both Islam or Turkish culture. They have to tune in to away from you you have this goal at heart. Enable them to to find out that you along with your upcoming partner usually endeavor not only to be great Muslims, but that you’re going to fit everything in you can in order to maintain the fresh Turkish people too. Possibly, you might delay marrying it woman for some weeks very she can actually choose becoming a beneficial Muslim and even initiate practicing the newest faith. Due to the fact a great Muslim, when the she can possess uniform telecommunications along with your moms and dads, possibly that might help your mother and father to be at ease with its upcoming daughter-in-legislation. Build numerous du’aa (supplication) so you can Allah (swt) and you can Istikhara (prayer getting suggestions) and you will seek Their (swt) ssistance since you create your ultimate decision. And you will Allah (swt) understands finest.
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